So Hungry I Could Eat A Zebra

Om nom nom nom nom.

The Asian leg of my world tour is almost over.

One backpack, two feet, three months travelling, four languages spoken, five cities seen and I’ve learnt more about the world than I would have reading 6 million books.

Funnily, my biggest indulgences in Vietnam was books. At only 20,000d or $1AUD / USD (because it’s the same right of exchange now, hurray!) each, you have to try really hard not to buy a whole library. Its too hot to go out in the middle of the day, so it’s best just sitting indoors wiling away the hours with a book.

One book has hundreds of parables with a cast of villagers in an ancient town; the wicked money lender, the lazy mandarin, the overworked apprentice,  the stupid farmer, the cunning trickster, the clever wife, the prankster child, the wise scholar, the sagely judge and the heavenly deity who restores order deus ex machina.

I remember stories from when I was very young. The tales are used by croons to teach their grandchildren about morals and how to live an honest life. I’m going to retell one as an example:

Our tale begins with a very wealthy man who enjoys more riches than can be spent in a hundred lives, yet he counts every penny of his fortune, guarding it jealously. One day an dear, old friend from the next village visits him.

The miserly host laments, “It’s so unfortunate that you’ve traveled far to see me and I can’t even invite you to stay for dinner. I have no food!”

His friend replies, “Ah, I tell you what – we’ll slaughter the horse I rode on and have a feast for the whole village!”

Surprised, the rich man exclaims, ”Well let us have a king’s feast then! But how will you make the long trip home without your horse?”

The cunning friend retorts, “between old friends this is nothing, and with your permission, I’ll ride home on one of the several fat ducks I saw in your backyard.”